It's got me thinking about guys and girls.
Girls, we're taught throughout our life that a guy will come along, sweep us off our feet and we'll live happily ever after. Books, films, programmes even friends and family tell us stories about those guys but it rarely happens in reality.
What we want is a guy that will treat us how we want to be treated, buy us gifts just cause he felt like it, go on romantic holidays, take us out to nice places, love us, care for us, trust us, talk to us and want to be seen with us.
We don't want to settle for less than that... we want him!
What we want to know is do guys like that exist? I'm not trying to scare any of you by saying that guys like this don't exist, it's just hard trying to find them! I don't want you looking at books and magazines for help because they might sound like they know what they're talking about, actually they do know what they're talking about but stuff like that will only scare you and make you feel crap. They'll tell you about how to meet the perfect guy, how you know when you've found him and how to live happily ever after. Articles and books like that will only bring you down. You'll listen to them and take in their advice and then when you go out and test it and it doesn't work, you'll come home thinking you're gonna end up like that crazy lady across the road with 10+ cats. Or maybe you'll think you'll end up like Miss Havisham and lock yourself in a room full of stuff you were going to have at your wedding and constantly stay in your would have been wedding dress.
Ladies, ladies, ladies. How pathetic can we get?
Young girls these days... as young as 10 maybe even younger, will complain about not having a boyfriend! My friends are always on about how they haven't got a boyfriend like it's the end of the world. Unless you're over 40 and you're still single then what are you worrying about??
I get that you want to be loved and want to belong to someone and have someone to call your own but seriously, there's no rush. You don't have to lock yourself in your room crying thinking your life is over because you don't have a guy.
Please, because you feel lonely, don't go out and settle for less than you deserve! I know, it's hard feeling lonely, it feels horrible but you're not lonely remember... you do have mates and family! I know I've said that it's rare that you'll find a guy who'll treat you the way you should be treated but it will happen. There is someone out there for all of us... that's why there's so many people in the world!
Don't wait for that guy though and don't go out and search till you reach the ends of the Earth... it will happen on it's own. He might be right in front of your eyes and you didn't realise. You might be out for a walk one day and he comes round the corner and bumps into you. You might meet him while you're out shopping. The list is endless! Go out and have fun! Sure you might end up having a few relationships before you get to him but that's part of life, we all go through that.
One more thing, don't make a list of all the things you want in a guy because you'll never find a guy who fits all those things... you won't even find a human being that will fit every thing on your check list. It's not fair on the guys either. No guy will want to be analysed and want to tick off everything on your check list, it'll make him feel crap.
The same goes for all the men in the films and books. Because of all those fictional, handsome, brave, strong men (did I mention fictional?) women now have expectations of what men should be like... stereotypes if you will. If they don't walk, talk, look like the guys we fantasise about, we become disappointed and realise that we'll never find our Prince Charming. How do you think guys feel about that when we tell them 'I'm sorry but you're just not what I'm looking for.' If you act and think like that, you won't find what you're looking for!
You'll get some guys out there who will treat you like a princess but no, you won't want him because he doesn't look like Bradley Cooper or Gerard Butler (or whoever!) or doesn't act like... Romeo!
Leave the Prince Charmings and Romeos in the books and films. Find your own guy. Don't make check lists, don't settle for less than you deserve and just go out and have fun. You only get one life remember, you're not a cat (even though I'm pretty sure cats probably don't have 9 lives!) so live it! Don't spend the majority of your life searching for 'him' or sat being miserable in your bedroom wishing you were with 'him'.
Oh and remember, you're amazing, you're beautiful, you're one in a million any guy would be lucky to be with you and you deserve to be happy and live a fantastic life. Don't tell yourself any different and don't let anyone tell you different either! :)
2 comments:
Exactly my thought on this subject! You such an amazing writer! I agree with the whole whole dont go out looking for 'Mr. Perfect' because no one is, we all have flaws. And very true about dont rush into it, because to be honest if you did you might not be ready for it. Plus theres plenty of time, you never know when someone will come along, Maybe tommrrow, a week etc. Anyway... keep up the good work ;D
Awesome Bec!! Don't want to patronise u but a very grown up opinion! Most of my single friends are only just realising this and they r 25! Life isn't like all the fairytale and even if you have a guy you can tollerate for the rest of ur lives it's still hard work. Girls need to be told more often to be true to themselves-not change who they are for people and definately shouldn't feel special only when a guy tell them they are. Guys rn't like girls and are never going to as romantic! Make ur own romance and be happy in who u r! Love this piece of writing Bec- think u shud make a realistic movie on relationships!
Post a Comment